Monday, August 16, 2010

Either I am cracking up more than usual. or I have a horrible feeling about all this

Its been a rough week in my head. People that are close to me know that I am mostly insane.. The parts of me that are not quite so nutty are usually in charge.. But the stress of Eve's injuries and ghosts of the past are driving me around the twist.. I really feel I am losing a bit more of my mind.

I was driving home, having attempted to shoot David's train again.. when it hit me. I mean a punch from nowhere.. I lost it. I did! I had to collect myself to get home safely.  Not a panic attack, I don't get those.. but a premonition or terror (Whatever) that I will lose Eve. No matter what course I choose tomorrow, I will kill that snake. Mostly likely due to my incompetence. Hmmmmmm

pass the Grog...

Friends are asleep, except David and Drue, but both are at work. So.. I think an early night..I am can lay of the alcohol, I will survive. Tomorrow is yet to come and I must wait and see.  AND YES I want someone to hold my hand.

I think I will pare my social media down to the closest of the close friends.. I need to get away. Maybe take my 5 days off next roster and go to RI??? It may help heal at least my fast fracturing sense of security...

At least I can sulk as I have cried myself into a migraine. YAY. :-(
IN other news.. this puppy belongs to Troy. He is cute.


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