Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Rant - fat shaming the other side



Recently I have found myself in the utterly ridiculous position of defending myself in the use of plus size.

i have an torn between being flattered and being annoyed at people who,  aside from my friends,  think it's their place to dictate to me the correct use of the term plus size or fat or Curvy.

Let's be clear.

 If you are not a close friend,  you have no right to say I look to anything.  Just say you like the outfit or not and leave your personal feelings about me to yourself.

The ones closest to me know I have been large. Very large and my shape now is due to dedication to my diet and some exercise. I had lipo on my back to reshape my dowagers hump and my love handles.

2012-11-21_1057-12-000 Yvonne and me at Byron Bay
Husband couldn't even get his arms around me. Size 22-24

 No magic snapping of fingers.  No posturing.  I was a fat kid.  I was a fat teen I was a fat adult.  I am blessed with good health and this has allowed me to shake the weight caused by my emotional eating.  I have big mood swings that have me eating non stop and this means I will always struggle to be a size 14 16 or even 18.
I have been the girl in the black coverall clothing.  I have been and am still a self hater.  I have been the wall flower because I didn't want people to see my in the spotlight.  I never had a first dance at  my weddings..
My journey is not your business.

I identify with the plus sized community no matter my current size as I am that fat girl in my head. The fact that this week I don't puff when I get up the stairs at the station doesn't mean tomorrow I won't again be a size 24/26.

To my haters.  Fat shaming goes both ways.. The fact I am currently at the lower end doesn't make me less worthy of your time.

Last Sunday. Size 14-16

 To my thinner sisters... Yay for you. I have my own fight and if I call myself fat and this offends you as you are a Simlar size and am disturbed by the tag....  See how many fucks I give.  Look the mirror and see that person? She can help you.  I can't.  I need to help the lady on my mirror live the life she deserves as best as she can.

peace out.



_________



20 comments:

  1. hmm.. In this day and age "plus size " is considered anything above size 8.. ( heard that from a plus sized model ).. there'll be alot of plus sized ppl out there..

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  2. black is my fall back colour option too and i wear it alot. here in Wellington its like the colour everyone wears but loves.

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  3. To whoever has taken issue with your use of the term plus size I think this post should put them firmly in their place. We all have our own journey and call ourselves an adjective to describe ourselves. I choose fat, you choose plus size and no one else has any right to dictate how the fuck we get to identify. xx

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  4. Somethings just get up my nose

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  5. You look so good in all those bright colours! Black is my fave, because of how versatile it is. I do have a lot of colour though. Actually I think I might just have way too many clothes haha

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  6. I think I do too but don't let the husband know that...heehee thank you Megan!! I do love brights!

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  7. Oh I wear black usually when I can't decide on a dress or skirt. As my hair is red.. black always works :-)

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  8. Haha you FENCE SITTER! You can't choose ALL OF THEM!! :P But i'll totally allow it for the hilariousness of the Monty Python reference ;) x

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  9. Hahahha yes I was sitting there.. What is my fav colour black.. No.. Red.. No.. Oo monty python..

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  10. Oh MAN, I identify with this post so much. I've never been about a size 18, and am currently surfing 14/16 waves but, yes I do get people questioning the labels I use. As you said, they know nothing about me, or you and it is UTTER INSANITY to be discriminated about because of your size in a movement that is based around no discriminating size!!!! HA! I also, like you, know what it is like to be fat. I liked in south korea and vietnam for more than 5 years and i was larger than 95% of the population, so, being stared at for being different, yeah, i'm used to that and I know how it feels, but Yvonne, whoa, these people SUCK and this post is on point ! <3

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  11. Yay! You have so much awesome colourful-ness, but I have to saw that black and white outfit is my favourite. You know Sacramento (http://www.mispapelicos.com/) ? She and her cohort of awesome Spanish bloggers Peggy Sue (http://www.mynameispeggysue.es/) and Sewing Adicta (http://www.sewingadicta.com/) do blog hops every 2 weeks (open for 3 days?) on Mondays called Share-In-Style. The theme for this monday is black and white ;)

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  12. Ooooo thanks for the tip hun. Did you see my begging on your company blog? I am hoping and wishing and will even beg.. Please! **puppy eyes **

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  13. actually, I didn't see it until just then, my IT business partner must have approved the comment and we haven't had our meeting this week. I can hold the size 16 Deep Sea Dress for you without a deposit. :) If you want the other stuff held as well (what's kraken maxi, deep sea skirt, gone fishin skirt) then we will probably have to sort out a deposit. :) Let me know and I will put aside what you want and calculate how to do this. ;)

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  14. I'll ask for a hold on the size 16 of the dress and order all at once with the others.. The maxi is limited? I was going to do a mad order on Friday am

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  15. The maxi is pretty limited, but, not as limited as the deep sea dress. So, I reckon your plan is a good one. IF the maxi has sold out by friday in your size, firstly, you could probably size down to 14 because it is stretchy, if miraculously both sizes have sold out, I will be getting more maxis probably by the end of Dec, so... you know. :D

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  16. Hun. If I could kiss you in person I would. You will have my order on Friday. Xoxox I can't wait! Damn my. Finances!

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  17. Hi Yvonne,
    There is only one size 16 Deep Sea Dress so I have put it on hold for you and changed it to sold out on the website. This was my genius way of ensuring no one else buys it...however, I just realized that YOU can't buy it! Hahahah, so, I might send u a paypal invoice for the dress and if you wish to buy other things you can go through the site and I'll post them all together? Is that okay? Also, I have already sold the What's Kraken Maxi Dress in size 16, but... I would honestly suggest the size 14 in the dress for you anyway as it has a lot of stretch and I just stalked your measurements. HA! Take a look at the sizing chart for this frock on the website and you'll see what I'm talking about. Anyway, YAY for new clothes and thanks for being such a wonderful and supportive customer. :)

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  18. Oh! THANK you! Send me. The invoice to. Paypal at woosang dot Id dot au. I'm happy to buy the size 14 Kraken and the add the rest on Friday. Squee! Thank you again! Now if only Friday was now!

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  19. Agree - super cute Crossroads dress! Very summery!


    http://www.amelieinoz.blogspot.com

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  20. This dress.. Its makes me so happy to wear. Have agrey day?? Put this dress on. YOu are the ray of sunshne.. :-)

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